


Not a Saviour, Just a Man

by lightbroke



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), Shadowhunters (TV) RPF, The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Family, Fluff, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Religion, Slow Burn, Therapy
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2018-11-06 13:06:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11036787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lightbroke/pseuds/lightbroke
Summary: Alexander Gideon Lightwood is left with a stepson, Henry Branwell.Having been married to Henry's mother, Lydia Branwell, for a year before her passing, the two are no strangers to each other. When his stepson's nightmares begin to reawaken, Alec looks for a child psychologist.Lucky for them, Dr. Bane is the only doctor on Alec's insurance that isn't completely booked.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Don't get mad at me about Alec & Lydia. I'm not erasing Alec's sexuality in any way. All will be explained in Chapter 2.

_I wish everyone would stop looking at me like I’m some sort of god. I’m not. It’s annoying. I’m just trying to raise my stepson. Alone. In the bustling hub of New York. Where everything is an uphill battle from getting him into a good school to finding an apartment with stable rent. His mother left him money but he isn’t eighteen yet. He won’t be eighteen for another 10 years. A decade. Please, anyone who’s listening out there…please tell me I don’t have to live through another decade of pitied stares. I’m just a man trying to raise my stepson._

_Oh, and get over this massive hangover._

With another full-bodied wretch, Alexander heaved into the toilet he was currently hugging. Thank the above his brother Jace was still in his apartment helping get Henry ready for school. 

_Still in the apartment…freeloading…either works._

A rough fist to the door jars him from his pity party. “Gotta say bye to the kid.” Oh how he wishes his blonde bobble head of a younger brother had some sensitivity towards others. Honestly, it’s forgivable in the end as Alec realizes Jace is probably hungover too.

Toilet water swirls the bowl whisking away the muted color yellow. His mouth is rinsed and minty. A tired hand opens the door with a squint; the sun is ripping through the blinds and burning his corneas.

“Ready to walk to school?” Alexander kneels as he always does, wrapping his arms around Henry. He’s small for his age and has his mother’s same sad eyes. 

“You smell funny.”

Alec smiles and presses a kiss to his forehead. “Smelling means your cold’s going away. And that means…”

Henry’s eyes light up. “Ice cream.” He whispers alongside his stepfather. 

“Why can’t you just give the kid ice cream with a cold?” Jace asks, rubbing his own bloodshot eyes. 

“It’s not advisable to give dairy to those with sinus infections. Makes phlegm worse.” Alec stands up. Aching knee joints protest. Taking Henry’s hand in his, he heads for the door.

His first mistake wasn’t leaving without his keys. No. Alec’s first mistake was assuming Jace would’ve stayed in the apartment until its owner returned.

 

 

“I’m gonna have to start charging you each time you make me unlock your goddamn door, Lightwood.” The super, Victor, growls as opens the safe for the master key. 

“You’re right. I should have just picked it, broken the handle, filed a complaint, and then you would’ve had to buy a whole knew handle.” Alec was in no mood to deal with anything. Not Victor. Not Jace. Not the sun blasting through every window. Not his bad luck. The only bright thing in his life was busy for the next six hours learning fractions and context clues. But even then, Alec had to face the realization that his bright reason of life was dimming again. 

_No. Not here. I can’t think about it here._

Victor had a penchant for reading peoples’ weaknesses and exploiting them. The last thing he wanted was for his super to see how Henry was his one and only weakness and threaten a call to the Department of Children and Families the next time he was late on rent. Alec agreed he wouldn’t think about it until Victor was long gone and he had a shower and at least one cup of coffee in his system.

 **It** was the fact that Henry was having nightmares again; nightmares that caused him to make a mess in the bed. Peeing one’s sleeping bag is not the fastest way to make friends. 

Alec hadn’t meant to for his stepson to see him hungover. The man was very good at being the picture perfect, or as close to, a perfect father as he could emulate. He could blame Jace or work at the factory but when boiled to the core, it was his own fault. Alec knew it was reckless to jump the gun. This would have been Henry’s first sleepover in months. A part of him was so excited that he hadn’t soaked the bed in that long. Henry was excited too. So when he received a call from a very annoyed mother that Henry was requesting to be picked up from his classmate's birthday party, it was already too late. Alec didn’t even remembering dialing Izzy but his call log says he did and Henry being home was proof he had. Too drunk to man the subway system let alone walk a straight line, Alec had called his sister to pick up her nephew. He was embarrassed and ashamed and swore that last night would be the last time he’d ever drink.

 _Okay, scratch that._ Alec stared at his coffee cup. _Yesterday’s the last night I’ll ever drink with Jace._

Taking out his laptop, Alexander popped open the homepage of his insurance company. That alone was the only reason why he worked at the factory; it was the best insurance in the state unless you were A.) a politician on the Hill B.) filthy stinking rich. If it weren’t for Henry’s chronic sinus colds and on-again-off-again need for therapy, Alec wouldn’t bother to put in a two weeks notice: He’d just stop showing up. Working the line at a defense contractor was not for the weak of spine or thin-skinned. Every time he turned on the news and saw new footage of places being blown to bits, whether an act of preemptive war or because of war itself, his stomach churned. He wondered if that was something he’d help solder or wired, if that death toll was on his back. 

Alec doesn’t watch the news anymore.

Shaking his head, he refocuses. Humming to himself, he scrolls down the listed providers. After narrowing the search, he thinks he’s found a handful of suitable licensed psychologists. Alexander and his late wife Lydia decided before she passed that psychiatry would wait until Henry was older. Nightmares had always been Henry’s Achilles heel. It was the one constant after his mother died three years ago.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three cheers for backstory!!

The list was growing shorter and shorter. With each name being hastily scratched off, Alec’s hope was dwindling. He knew for certain that any local church would agree to counsel Henry but Alexander had his reservations. His parents were highly religious; his father more so than his mother, and that caused a fair share of tightly strung tensions to cut through the Lightwood family. It didn’t help that both Alec and Isabelle weren’t exactly straight. The happiest he had ever seen his father, Robert Lightwood, was when he was waiting at the end of the aisle for their longtime family friend Lydia Branwell. Even though he knew his son was gay, he smiled and beamed and bragged to all his friends that his son had gotten married and was a stepfather. Even though the marriage was a sham, he paraded them around and gave printouts of wedding photos to colleagues. And when Lydia passed and all were donned in black, Alec swore it was his father who cried the hardest. 

Phone to ear, Alec was restless. If he believed in luck he would’ve had all his fingers crossed. The last name on the list was a new upload, a Dr. Magnus Bane. There was little about him on the web, which was disheartening. Alec wasn’t about to toss Henry to anyone with a degree. After a brief conversation with the receptionist, Alexander let out a tense sigh of relief. It was tense because at this point in his life he doubted it was even possible for him to completely mellow out. While every nudge in life tried to shove him towards bitterness, the man refused. There wasn’t a single thing he would change. His decisions had helped so many others that, he felt, it would be a crime to shift anything––the butterfly effect and all. Rebel from his family’s ways and he never would have met Lydia. Had he never met Lydia, she never would have gotten the extra time afforded to her and in turn, her son would have been shorted a year of his mother. 

It all started in the church’s youth group. The Lightwoods had been going to Institute Baptist for generations. Robert was a deacon, Maryse, Alec’s mother, worked with the choir, and the Lightwood kids were entrenched in the youth group. Jace led the worship band for a while, that is until he realized kissing girls was more fun. Isabelle had always led the pack in terms of rebellion. While other church going mothers tried to shape and mold their daughters into gendered roles, Izzy was crashing ‘boy’s wood shop’ or stitching the feminist power movement symbol onto her embroidery. Alec was Robert’s second chance. Alec was en route to becoming a pastor that would one day be the head of Institute Baptist. To Robert Lightwood, Alec was a way to undo his own past and pave a better way for the future. Had it not been heretical, Alexander swore his father would have thought his own son was the way into heaven. 

Micromanagement was Robert’s middle name. The eldest Lightwood didn’t mind though. It was nothing but temporary to him. One day he’d get out, at least that’s what him and Lydia, who he’d met through the youth group, promised each other. They had both promised each other that they would work endlessly towards true love and happiness. Lydia had her eyes set on a tall and handsome boy named John Kapadia. His parents were not just new to New York but new to America. Immigrants from India, their son had been quick to adopt ‘an American name’. Only Lydia knew John’s real name but she refused to break his promise. John was determined to acclimate as quickly as possible. Alec, on the other hand, had his eyes set on a tall and handsome boy too…on _many_ tall and handsome boys. Racism and homophobia, two cards held in the same hand, Lydia and Alec grew closer together. They were able to bond over struggles faced in their home life. As time grew on, their relationship provided a comfortable beard for one another. Alexander was Lydia’s excuse to see John and Lydia was Alec’s excuse to go on dates and test the waters. But webs can only weave so wide before their strength turns into their downfall.

Jace’s lust for women was forgivable. Isabelle’s stubbornness and inability to honor thy mother and father was forgivable. Alec’s _‘constant and incessant tendency towards sin’_ was damning. And to make matters worse, when Izzy had come out later on, Robert was convinced that his son had “perverted my daughter with his worldly ways!” Needless to say, Robert was as quick as a viper to enact church discipline on his own blood. Alec was formally removed from Institute Baptist’s roster as well as the Lightwood household.

It was the Branwell’s that took Alexander in. They paid no mind to gossip, too busy with their careers and own demons. This is where Alec and Lydia grew close. This is also where Alec started to notice Lydia suffered from chronic nosebleeds. 

Her brushing off turned into begging. Alec didn’t feel comfortable betraying her and going to her parents. Maybe he was overdramatizing the whole thing. Maybe her headaches and nosebleeds were normal. Maybe. Maybe. Maybe. 

After two more years of maybes, Alec and Lydia were high school graduates. Practically the day she turned eighteen, that girl made a beeline to the courthouse with the one man she’d ever had eyes for: John. Alexander had never seen a happier person. There’s happiness but then there’s actual happiness: I’ve met my other half, happiness; I don’t feel empty anymore, happiness. And that happiness drowned out his maybes along with the casual distance of their parting ways. The Branwell’s extended their home to Alec for six months beyond graduation, giving him time to save and befriend others before kicking him out. Lydia and John were happier than ever in their one room loft in the city. He was in genuine awe of their relationship. Living paycheck to paycheck never looked so good before. Nothing seemed capable of getting in their way. Nothing.

> Nothing

He remembered looking into her eyes and seeing _nothing._ There wasn’t even sadness. There wasn’t even a spark of her soul left in her bloodshot blues. “He’s gone. He’s gone. I can’t believe he’s gone.” She would cry as Alec held her. As Izzy held her. As Jace held her. “He’s gone. He’s gone. I can’t believe he’s gone.”

The ceremony was beautiful. Everyone wore white. Alec didn’t know a vase, or later as he learned, an urn, could look so breathtaking. Everyone loved him. Them: The widow and her son. It hadn’t taken long for Lydia to get pregnant after the two married.

> This is when the maybes came back. 

Pregnancy wears on everyone differently but Alec had noticed after John’s passing that Lydia’s in particular left her worse for wears. He chalked it up as grief taking permanent residence on her face and frame. At least until she couldn’t afford her place on one paycheck and Alec offered both Lydia and her son to move in with him and Jace. A year later when Isabelle would graduate high school and join the group it would prove a tight fit, four adults and a toddler, but they had made it work.

Jace worked night shifts and slept during the day. Iz had classes at NYU throughout the day and was no stranger to city nightlife. Alec worked days at a nearby café, steadily climbing his way up to a potential management position, and was home at night able to take care of Henry. This gave Lydia time to rest. It was this needed time that began to increase slowly but surely. He didn’t mind. Alexander loved Henry as if he were his own and loved Lydia as if she was a sister. But just as steadily as her times of rest increased, so did the maybes. _Maybe_ this isn’t normal. _Maybe_ this isn’t just grief. _Maybe_ the bloody tissues in the bathroom trashcan aren’t from shaving accidents. Alec knew he had to make a change. He knew that this game of maybes was too risky. There were lives at risk, both Lydia’s and Henry’s. He also knew that no one in the tiny apartment could afford insurance. Izzy had a plan through her university but it was for her alone to use. That’s when Alec applied for the position at the defense contractor. Their biggest selling point wasn’t the hourly wage or overtime abilities but their amazing insurance.

Laughable is the word considering Alec thought his only hurdle was applying for insurance. Lydia was neither his wife nor child so she didn’t qualify for coverage. It was like staring down the barrel of a gun. The light at the end of the tunnel had clicked off. He’d given up a steady climb towards independence and sanity to work in a factory line making things he was contractually obligated to stay quiet about. 

It wasn’t the most romantic proposal out there. He’d gotten Izzy to watch Henry. She’d brought her girlfriend Maia along. Together the three of them went out for ice cream and a movie. He wasn’t scared or nervous. His palms weren’t sweaty. His heart was steady. Alec knocked on her door and listened for the soft ‘Come in.’ 

He planted himself on the edge of the bed, looked her dead in the eye, and called her out. “We both know something bigger is going on here, Lydia. I won’t let you be in denial of it anymore. For your sake or Henry’s.” Her eyes grew big and flashed with momentary anger and then loss. “I found a way to get you to some of the best doctors in the tri-state area. All you have to do is say yes.” It wasn’t anything fancy, that would come later––completely funded by one Robert Lightwood. Presenting her with his high school ring, he asked, “Will you, Lydia Kapadia, marry me, Alec Lightwood?” For the sake of her son, she said yes. 

Time and time again throughout the planning process Lydia had told Alec he didn’t have to do this. Time and time again Alec never regretted proposing. It was the best of all possible worlds: Henry would keep his mom and Lydia would keep her son. 

In the end, after vows were said and done and they spent their ‘honeymoon’ at Disney letting Henry have run of the park, their plan had worked for roughly two years. Having been in denial for so long, the best they could do was fight the aggressive form of cancer wreaking havoc on her body to a plateau. When Henry was seven, his mother passed. Alec had already formally adopted him as his own a year before so thankfully it negated any legal battles upon Lydia’s death.

> ...

A shrill ringing cut Alec’s concentration. Nearly dropping the phone he fumbles it so wildly, Alec barely picks up the call before it cuts out. “Hello?”

“Mr. Lightwood?” 

_“Yes…”_

__

“Hi, this is Raj at Dr. Bane’s office. It slipped my mind to tell you beforehand when we were scheduling but it’s normal practice for new patients to arrive fifteen to twenty minutes earlier for the sake of paperwork.” 

__

“Right.” 

__

“And Dr. Bane prefers the parent to come in with the child for at least the first half of the session for the first few times. It helps set a sense of safety for the child.” 

__

“Uh huh.” Alec scratches his head. “Are you new?” 

__

He could practically hear the man blushing on the other line. “Is it that obvious?” 

__

Alexander’s laugh is light but present. “I mean this is a lot of information you forgot to tell me when I called earlier.” He finds himself laughing again. “But you’re doing great. Don’t worry. Secret’s safe with me.” 

__

After a polite close to the conversation, Alec grabs a packet of Pop-Tarts and heads for his bed, making sure to put his alarm on for 2:55 that way he can pick Henry up from school come 3:30. 

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don’t worry, Chapter 3 is where we get to meet the long awaited Dr. Bane!!
> 
> Follow me on Twitter at @lightbroke <33


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Patience is rewarded! Hellllooo Dr. Magnus Bane ^-^

Sterile is the only word ever proper enough to describe every medical professional’s office he’s ever been to. Whether they were years in the business or new age and holistic, everything from the bathroom to the waiting room to the furthest corner smelled empty. Void. The scent of lost, trapped souls. _Okay, now you’re being a drama queen. There’s no way souls have a smell. Taper it down._ Alec shakes his head.

“Are you okay?” Alec looks down to wide eyes staring up at him. They’d stopped, hand in hand, at the first step inside the psychologist’s office. “Can I…” Henry nudges his head towards the toy area.

Taking out his travel bottle of hand sanitizer from his satchel, he squirts a few drops onto Henry’s hand. “What do we make sure?”

“Not to touch our eyes or nose or mouth after touching the toys.”

With a hand fluffing out his hair, Alec lets his stepson go to the brightly colored kids area while he heads for reception. _Fifteen to twenty minutes later, no kidding. Damn. This is like an inch of paperwork. Christ._ Always prepared, he takes out a pen. Unlucky for him, it rolls out of ink halfway through. Not having brought a spare, Alec does the next best thing.

 

Dr. Bane never really knows what to expect whenever a new patient comes through his doors. He can almost always count on distance between the child and parent or parents though, so when he stepped into the waiting room to call for Henry Kapadia and Alexander Lightwood, he did not expect to see what he saw.

Having run out of ink and with a line at reception, the next logical option was to simply use another writing utensil. Lo and behold, where Henry was seated was a pile of crayons. _There isn’t any law against filling out legal paperwork with Crayola, is there?_

As if their minds were one, Henry stifles a giggle when he sees his stepfather rummage through the crayon box for a black crayon sharp enough to keep filling out paperwork. Used to his father’s unique ways, he keeps quiet but can’t stop himself from smiling.

“Kapadia and Lightwood?” A soft voice rings out.

Alec feels a tug on his sleeve, “Just a minute, kiddo.”

There was another tug followed by a, “Our names. They’re saying our names.” Alec looks up. Staring right back at him is a tall man perhaps a little older than himself with black hair spiked upwards, a paisley maroon shirt tucked into very expensive looking slacks, and shoes shinier than Alec thought possible. “I like your hair.” Henry set his toys down and sticks his hand out. They’d seen so many doctors, the pair of them, that they knew this song and dance. 

Henry was busy dragging a beanbag in front of the loveseat Alexander chooses. Perched between Alec’s legs, he gives Dr. Bane a long stare. Dr. Bane gives Henry a long stare as well. Alec finds himself wondering if this is some weird psychological fight for dominance and if he’d made a big mistake in bringing Henry to someone who had such little Internet presence.

Henry begins. “Hello. I’m Henry Kapadia and this is my best friend Alec Lightwood. I’m eight. I like cars but think buses are cool too. I think my teacher Miss Aline is awesome but I think Coach Starkweather is dumb. He makes us do too many pushups. My favourite color is purple and I do not have a favourite animal.” Alec smiles shyly and begins to run his thumb into his palm. Just because Henry is comfortable in front of doctors of all kinds didn’t mean he was. Henry shoots his head back and stares at Alec expecting him to go next. The man pales and offers Dr. Bane wide, helpless eyes.

“Hello, Henry. I’m Dr. Bane. I am,” Alec realizes when the doctor laughs it travels to the corners of his eyes, “most definitely not eight years old. I too like cars but think planes are equally as cool. I think it’s great that you like your teacher. I also think it’s great you have such strong opinions. I love the color purple. My favourite animal is the cat.” 

Another wave of silence follows. Alec swallows hard. “I’m um, Alec-Alexander Lightwood. This is my son, Henry. I’m 26. I don’t have a vehicular preference. Miss Aline _is_ pretty awesome. Um… 

“Favourite color.” Henry nudges.

“I like dark green?” Alec shrugs softly. “And I think geckos are interesting.” Henry pats Alec’s knee and shifts back to face Dr. Bane, smiling proudly. Alec knows to a point that this confidence is nothing more than a front. His stepson isn’t manipulative but he is smart. Smart enough to know that wetting the bed at eight isn’t commonplace and neither is seeing a therapist. Smart enough to activate all attempts at social self-preservation: Get in, get out, go home.

Dr. Bane’s smile feels genuine and helps Alec feel a little more at ease. Not at ease enough to open up about himself, but to trust Henry in his hands.

Having spent the remainder of their session back in the waiting room, when the door opens again, Dr. Bane calls him to the doorway. He’s sent Henry to play in the kid’s area for the time being. Thankfully, he’s still in eyeshot to Alec. Just because he likes the doctor’s smile doesn’t mean he’s reckless enough to leave his son stranded in the toy bin over it.

“I just have one question.” Dr. Bane’s brows furrow, perplexed. “His best friend, Alec Lightwood?”

“Yeah.” He can’t help but feel deflated. “I…he lost his dad when he was really young and his mother always kept him in the picture and told him stories. To keep the memory alive, you know?” 

The angle of Dr. Bane’s brow deepens. “His father and mother…? Henry’s adopted.” There was still a questioning lilt to his statement. Alec nods. Dr. Bane relaxes instantly and lets out a relieved laugh. He presses his hand to Alexander’s shoulder and gives it a cheery squeeze. “Here I am thinking he was incapable of calling his biological father, dad.”

Alec lets out a soft chuckle. “Twice. He’s called me dad twice.” He’s not sure why he shared that fact or why it was so easy to in the first place. With a shake of his head, he takes a step back. “Thanks again for seeing us so soon, Dr. Bane.”

“Please, feel free to call me Magnus. All the parents do.”

“Henry.” Alec calls out, sticking his hand out. Like a magnet, Henry’s much smaller grip clicks into place. “We’ll see you next week.” Alec’s gaze lingers for a few seconds too long. It’s met with an inquisitive look from the doctor and promptly followed by an impatient tug from Henry. “Right-right. Okay. Bye.” Turning abruptly, the two head back home.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to follow me on Twitter at @lightbroke <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maia Roberts & sparkly Dr. Bane!!

“So,” Izzy has her arms stretched over the kitchen counter, fingers drumming along the edge. There is a mix of curiosity and expectation highlighting her brows as she waits for her stoic bigger brother to tell her how Henry’s appointments are going. It had been a month since Alec told Iz that he’d found a doctor. Like usual, Alec doesn’t budge at the first bid.

“Hmm?”

Izzy leans further against the counter, trying to snag the back of Alexander’s shirt for an impatient tug. He flits around her and finds his way into the kitchen. Just as he’s about to cave and tell her, his countenance shifts when he sees his baby sister’s lower back. “You got a tattoo.” Isabelle snorts. “I can’t believe you got a tramp stamp.”

She yanks her shirt down and whips around. “Actually, it’s henna. Maia and I got bored and bought a kit.”

“Then why hide it so quickly?” A strong brow arches upwards.

“Because maybe I don’t want my brother staring at the small of my back.”

Alec rolls his eyes and moves to the fridge as was initially intended. “Way to make me sound like a creep Iz.”

Isabelle trails after Alec and echoes his movements getting a Gatorade as well. “It’s embarrassing. It’s whatever. We were drunk. It’s nothing and’ll fade in a few days.”

“I think you actually like it and are considering making it permanent.” Alec cracks open his bottle after a few shakes. He knows his sister better than he knows himself.

“Stop making this about me. You’re deflecting. Tell me about Henry.”

“Now who’s deflecting?” Alec smirks.

“Um...” Alec sees how her lips purse in annoyance and knows he’s in for it now. “Who was it that called me blackout drunk at 1am asking to pick up his son? The day of my 8am midterm?”

Alec gives after stomaching a wave of guilt and a grimace. “It went okay. I think Henry really likes him. Yesterday I overheard them talking in the hallway how their skin is more similar in comparison to each others versus mine and his.” He chuckled softly. Henry was always comparing colors and hues. Henry and Clary, Jace’s girlfriend, could go on for days painting and coloring side by side. Henry was Alec’s junior Picasso.

“Yesterday? But don’t you go see him on Tuesdays?”

“Dr. Bane suggested we do sessions twice a week.” Izzy sucked in a sad breath. “Not for anything bad.” Alec was quick to placate. “Tuesdays we do joint sessions and then Thursdays it’s just Henry.” There was a beat as the man thought. “I haven’t seen him click with a doctor so genuinely before. Or so fast.” Normally Henry’s smiles were polite but stiff with anyone in a white coat but it was different with Dr. Bane.

“So how do you like him?”

“He’s good with Henry so I like him just fine.”

“No, no, no, that’s not what I mean.” Izzy jumps onto the counter and sits down just as the front door opens. She waves Maia into the kitchen. “They’re joint sessions so I can only assume he makes you talk too.” Isabelle offers her drink to her longtime girlfriend, Maia Roberts. Alec smiles a shy hello.

“What are we talking about?” Maia’s warmth lights the entire kitchen. Alec was always highly protective of his sister but when he met Maia he knew she would take damn good care of her. Almost immediately he included her into the fold.

“Henry’s new therapist. Well Alec’s too.” Izzy wraps her arms around Maia’s waist and leans her chin against her shoulder.

“Isn’t that against the code or something? Therapist law?” Warm brown eyes scan back and forth between the Lightwoods. “I don’t think he’s allowed to have both you and your kid as patients.”

“Joint sessions. Father-son stuff, not Alec and Henry separately. Sorry babe.” Izzy smiles and kisses her cheek. Alec looks away to offer than the privacy of the moment. Loneliness tugs his heart.

“Who is this guy anyway? What’s his name?”

“Magnus Bane.” Alec says, finally reentering the conversation.

Maia burst out laughing. He shoots a worried glance to his sister whose girlfriend is fishing her phone out of her back pocket and quickly skimming through it. “ _That_ Magnus Bane?” She practically shoves the phone into Alexander’s face. On the screen he sees the twice a week familiar face except he isn’t wearing white-collar attire. Actually he isn’t wearing much of **_anything_**. “Don’t get drool on my phone now. I don’t have water damage insurance on it.” She shows Izzy the picture next.

“What…wh-where…” Alec stammers. He can’t get the image of Dr. Bane wearing short shorts made of police caution tape. He also can’t help but think how he wishes it was a full 360º photo instead of just front facing.

“It’s an ABC party. Anything But Clothes.” Maia’s grin is wicked and over the moon now. “I was hired out to plan a charity event for Pandemonium and he was one of the highest contributors. It was for some pet charity or something. I don’t remember. Blurry night.”

“So Dr. Bane gets around.” Izzy shrugs with a smile.

“I mean, not really. I don’t think he went home with anyone that night. Danced with everyone but stayed to help clean up actually.” Maia chuckles realizing the oddity of an attendee and donor volunteering to help sweep streamers and cocktail napkins off the floor.

Alec laughs softly and squeezes the back of his neck. “I never imagined him…I mean, maybe reading in a coffee shop in his free time or probably hiking.” _With legs like that hell yeah he hikes up high inclines._ “But not _partying_ much less wearing that.”

“Do you imagine him often, Alec?” Maia teases, shooting Izzy a mischievous glance. He turns a deep crimson. “Because…” Alec’s phone buzzes. When he opens the text from none other than Maia, he sees a Facebook invitation to an ABC party being held at some club called Fae Glades. “Kind of up your ally seeing as it’s being held on gay night.”

“Fae Glades?” Alec rolls his eyes. “Kind of an offensive name don’t you think?” _Fae? Fairy?_ Alec rolls his eyes again.

Izzy sighs. As much as she loves her brother sometimes his tendency to jump to the worst conclusions grinds her nerves. She shows him her phone next. “It’s a really ethereal looking place and like everything is huge to make you feel as tiny as Tinkerbell. It’s actually really cool.”

“I guess so.” He mutters handing her back her phone and pocketing his own.

“We should all go.” Maia chirps. “And I’ll invite Magnus.” She adds a beat later, attention wholly on Alec. Maia was an expert at reading people plus, how big Alexander’s eyes became when he saw the photo of the doctor was a dead giveaway to her.

“How could you even do that?” Alec shakes his head. “I wouldn’t even know what to wear.” He shakes his head again. “I mean, what about Henry? I’m not leaving him with Jace.”

“Clary’s back in town.” She’d been in Maine visiting family, something about an engagement party between her mom and long time boyfriend Luke. Isabelle hops off the counter. “And we all know how much Henry loves Clary.”

“Then I defer to my previous concern: I enjoy clothes too much to wear anything but them.” He crosses his arms. Interest had sparked in his mind but stubbornness and embarrassment were winning out. He was a father for god’s sake. _Father’s don’t attend ABC parties. Then again…I didn’t think licensed psychologists did either._ “I don’t do parties.”

Maia and Isabelle share a long look. “Meet me for coffee tomorrow at 5pm outside Java Jones and we’ll talk. Okay?” Maia offered an apologetic smile. She knew how overzealous and excitable she could be sometimes. She also knew how tentative and careful her girlfriend’s brother could be.

“Fine.” Alec grumbled. “5pm. Outside. Coffee at Java Jones.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on twitter @lightbroke   
> <33


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on Twitter @lightbroke

“Dr. Bane? Uh-um, I mean, M-Magnus?” Alec practically gawks. He was running a little late for his meeting with Maia, just ten minutes but still, the boy loves being punctual hence the apology.

“Alexander.” Magnus smiles warmly. He’s holding his phone just as Alec is, looking down and around as if he too were meeting someone.

“Um, are you…?” He nudges to the door.

“I’m waiting for someone.” Magnus blushes. “They told me to wait outside.” 

Alec chuckles and runs his fingers through his hair. “Me too actually. My friend Maia.”

Magnus gives Alec a strange look. “I’m waiting for my friend Maia as well.” He says slowly.

“5pm outside Java Jones.” The two say simultaneously. Alec rolls his eyes and Magnus laughs.

“You don’t think––“

Magnus picks up Alec’s thought with a nod. “I think we’ve been bamboozled.” He shakes his head and pockets his phone after spending a few seconds shooting out a text. Alec does the same, sending Maia a series of red-faced angry emojis. “If anything, I guess this means you’ve spoken positively of my services to your friend?” There was uncertainty in the lilt of his voice.

“Of course. Henry’s in love with you. I’ve never seen him click with anyone so fast before. _No one_.” Alexander emphasizes. Even with the people in his own life, Henry had been cautious but with Magnus the boy practically flew into his arms. Curiosity as to why Magnus seemed almost scared waiting for Alec’s answer pricked the corner of his mind.

“Well…” Magnus says after a lull of silence.

“Sorry.” Alec had the tendency of staring when he was deep in thought.

“It’s okay. I’m a big proponent of thinking.”

“How did you know that’s what I was doing?”

A wide grin overtakes Magnus’ lips. “Because Henry does the same thing after I ask him a hard question.”

 

* * *

 

“We’re wearing _clothes_ to the ABC party.” Alec says as he walks into his apartment. He doesn’t have to wonder if Isabelle or Maia are there or not; he _knows_ they are. What he doesn’t expect comes in a much shorter and smaller package.

“Why wouldn’t you wear clothes to a party?” Henry looks up at his step-father with curious and mildly disgusted eyes.

“Why aren’t you asleep? It’s a school night and it’s…” he latches up his sleeve and is taken aback when he’s reminded of the time again. “It’s 11:00pm.”

“Exactly.” Isabelle tries to deflect the entire situation. “What are you doing just coming home at 11 on a work night?”

“No, no, no, no we’re not doing this. I’m an adult. Henry is a child, no offense Henry.”

“None taken.” He snickers. With a fluid movement of a raised arm and pointed finger, Henry follows the direction to go to the bathroom to get ready for bed.

“Not again.” Alec reprimands his sibling before following behind the boy so they can brush their teeth together.

“Did I hear that right?” Jace still has barbeque sauce staining the corner of his mouth. “Alec’s going to an Anything But Clothes party?” Blonde brows rise high. Izzy laughs in response. “Pictures. I demand pictures, sister.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry that it's such a short update. I'm in the process of moving so things are hectic. Once everything settles there will be regularly scheduled updates as well as longer chapters. Thanks for your support and patience <3


	6. Chapter 6

“What do you mean Henry’s failing math?” Alec, who normally stayed quiet, is furious. It doesn’t make sense. Nothing Henry’s teacher, Mrs. Herondale, says makes any sense.

“You see, Mr. Lightwood, it’s simply that he just can’t seem to get a grasp on his multiplication tables. It’s affecting other channels in his life.”

“It’s affecting other channels in his life.” Alec repeats flatly. “Because he apparently doesn’t know his times tables is he not running a fast enough lap in phys. ed.?” Izzy places a calming hand overtop Alec’s. He didn’t use to bring his sister to these parent-teacher conferences but ever sense the guidance counselor suggested _Henry needs the tender love and care of a mother figure in his life_ , Isabelle invited herself. “I’ll show them tender love and care”, she’d proclaimed the night Alec told his family.

“Mr. Lightwood,” the teacher begins.

“Mrs. Herondale––”

“Please, call me Imogen.”

“Imogen.” He clenches his jaw. “What I’m trying to say is that my son _knows_ his multiplication tables. He knows long division. He knows fractions and that’s not even covered until next year. Henry’s not stunted.” Alec crosses his arms. “He’s more than advanced so please enlighten me as to what seems to be happening in _your_ classroom because _I’m_ at a loss.”

Just as Imogen was about to explain her side, the loud speaker blared to life: Mrs. Herondale to Principal Dieudonné’s office. Her face pinches. Alec doesn’t dare lower his glower, and Isabelle sits an innocent bystander to all of this.

“I apologize for having to cut this meeting short.”

“I don’t.” Normally, Alec knew teachers had it rough. Thirty plus kids to one teacher was an insane ratio let alone the fact that educators are paid poorly, but when it came to Henry, Alec didn’t care enough about being polite. That was his son and something was wrong here. “I’m interested in your point of view on all of this. Here’s my email.” He scribbled his information onto a blue sticky note and set it back on her desk. “Feel free to enlighten me, Imogen. I want to know how to better help my son.” His words are diamonds against glass, sharp, articulate, and unforgiving. Imogen excuses herself and holds her door open for Isabelle and Alec to leave.

 

“ _Alec_. Alec!” Izzy speeds her steps. “Alexander!” The man stops at the final heed of his sister. “What was that? You! …Look, I get it. Henry’s your world but Jesus, Alec. She’s just trying to do her job.”

“I know.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “I know.” Alec sighs. The mill of the city begins to fill in the empty places between and around Alec and his sister. “It just doesn’t make sense, Iz. He’s making progress, so much progress. You should see him after every session with Magnus; he’s over the moon. He’s smiling. He hasn’t wet the bed in weeks.”

Izzy watches her brother. “Magnus? We’re on a first name basis now?”

“Focus, Izzy.”

“Fine, fine.” She puts her hands up in surrender. “Listen, I’m not saying Imogen’s right. I’m not saying any of this makes sense. All I’m saying is that you should cut her some slack.”

“This is Henry we’re talking about. I don’t want to cut anyone that works with him any slack. He deserves proactive action not laziness.”

“Then you should just homeschool him.”

“What?!” Alec’s brows rise. “I can’t quit work; you know that.”

“Then you need to make friends or at least make nice with his teachers.” She says softly, hand on his arm. “If you can make nice with his therapist then I think you’re perfectly capable of behaving with his educators.”

After a beat of silence Alexander rolls his eyes and begins walking again. “Stop being right all the time Isabelle. That’s my job.” He mutters.

* * *

 

“Can I talk to you?” Henry moves past Alec and tinkers around the play area.

“Is something wrong?” Dr. Bane’s brows furrow with worry.

“No. Well, maybe. No? I don’t know.” Alec rings his wrists and checks over his shoulder nervously for his stepson.

“It sounds like something is wrong.” Dr. Bane crosses his arms over his chest. Alec could tell from the redness around Henry’s eyes that it had been a particularly tough session. He was sure it wore on the doctor as well.

“Dr. Bane, your next patient is here.” Raj says, placing a thick manila folder through a sliding glass window before going back to his seat.

“Here.” Magnus takes out his business card and writes his number on the back of it. “I don’t normally give this out but I’m booked back to back today. Call me tonight after six and we’ll talk, alright?” Normally, Magnus would wait until the next session but it being their last of the week, it would be four days until their next meeting.

Alec looks down at the card and nods slowly. “Alright. I will.” Just as he’s about to say thank you, Dr. Bane has disappeared and another family is making their way into his office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on twitter @lightbroke


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A phone call and a party. Gotta love fast forwarding.

Dinner was done, as was Henry’s homework. Alec can hear the TV playing softly in the background: Beethoven, Henry’s favourite movie. It was the closest they could get to adopt a dog. Maneuvering Magnus’ business card between his fingers, he looks down at the scrawled number. Alexander can’t help but guiltily wish he’d gotten his cell phone number a different way. There are men at work who show interest but Alec doesn’t reciprocate.

Doctor Magnus Bane on the other hand, from the first time he’d seen him, Alec was hooked. He can’t explain it. He feels a magnetic draw to the man. It was because of this that he throws the card away. There is guilt associated in calling him because he knows, while the conversation would be somber, a part of him would enjoy hearing his voice so close to his ear. He decides he can wait until the next Tuesday when they have joint sessions.

With Henry in bed by 9:00, Alec was closing in for the night. Not many had his personal number, really only his family. Because of this whenever an unknown number calls, his curiosity peaks and he picks up.

“You hadn’t called and I was worried something happened so I went into Henry’s personnel files. I hope you don’t mind.” Alec recognizes that voice. “Hello?" 

“Sorry I…” Alec doesn’t know what to say. Something came up? He got busy? He forgot? He didn’t want to juggle shame?

“It’s okay.” Magnus cuts in, as if he feels apprehension from the other line and wants to toss a buoy. “I’m just glad you’re not upset with me.”

“I could never.” Alec answers automatically and with a smile on his face. “I mean,” a blush runs to his cheeks. “Because of all you’ve done for Henry, I mean.” He tries to clarify hurriedly. “Thank you for calling.” Alec says after a momentary lull. Little does he know in that lull sat Magnus, blushing and flustered on his end of the line.

“Consider you and Henry favorites of mine. I’m very invested in your son’s progress.”

* * *

 

“I didn’t call you that night because,” Alec starts over the roar of the music. Whether it was the party or the shots, probably the shots, he was feeling courageous. “because I felt bad for knowing I’d enjoy it.” He continues to sway to the beat of the music, looking at Magnus. Days had flown by and the night of the ABC party had come. Naturally, Alec wore a shirt and jeans, sticking out like a sore thumb. It was only because he knew Maia that the bouncer let him in in the first place. Magnus on the other hand wore a bubble wrap skirt. Poor Alec didn’t even know how to approach him when he first saw him. All he knew was that he was that bubble wrap had never looked so appealing before. _There’s a joke about popping his skirt here somewhere…_ he thought to himself.

“What do you mean?” He calls back, looking up, eyes confused.

 “You. This. Your voice. I-I don’t know. It didn’t feel right for me to call to talk about Henry when a part of me was excited to talk to you on a more personal level. Outside your office I mean.”

“You didn’t call me because you wanted to hear my voice?”

“No.” He coughed out. “Well…yes.” Alec answers sheepishly. “It’s stupid I know––“ But he’s suddenly cut off with a kiss. It’s warm and full and Alec’s eyes immediately close. His hands wrap around Magnus’ bare midriff and pull him in close, but not too close. Their bodies are hot together. The music is loud but beginning to drown out. Alec goes in for another kiss but is met with nothing. His eyes flutter open.

“I shouldn’t have done that.” Magnus stares at his patient’s father with wide eyes.

“We shouldn’t have taken so long to do that.” His eyes fall back down to the lips he wants to become reacquainted with so badly.

“You’re a patient of mine. I-I shouldn’t’ve–” Magnus is ripe with worry. Worry that is not registering to one very interested Alexander Lightwood. 

“Then we’ll cut the joint sessions and you can just see Henry.” Alec’s arms haven’t left Magnus’ hips since they initially wound around them.

“That’s not the point. Alec. _Alec_ ,”

What is usually either calm or smiling is worried and tense. Alec pulls back but doesn’t pull away. His brows crease and he squints, trying his hardest to focus. _What happened to no more drinking, Lightwood?_ He asks himself. The booming bass suddenly sounds far too loud and the bodies around them stifling. “Let’s go somewhere else.” Without waiting for a response, Alec takes Magnus’ hand and begins to lead him to the roof of Fae Glades.

“Talk to me.” Alec runs his hands through his hair and tugs at his sweaty shirt.

“I did. I shouldn’t have done that.” Only Magnus’ hand hasn’t left Alec’s.

“You keep saying that.” The reality of how he might have fucked this up begins to settle in on him like a weight in the pit of his stomach. “Please say-say something else. Anything else.” His voice has fallen and is quiet. It is just barely audible of the echo of residual base coming through the roof.

“I shouldn’t have done that.” Magnus looks down.

“It’s getting cold.” Alec says after a few minutes of silence. He gives Magnus’ hand a squeeze and nudges to the fire escape. Alexander has a feeling that if they go through the party again to exit something bad will happen like another kiss. “Can your skirt withstand a climb?” Magnus lets go of Alec’s hand and tugs at the side of the tie of his skirt. It falls to the ground in rolls and reveals biker shorts beneath it all. “My place is pretty close. We can sober up there?” Alec kicks the bubble wrap away from their feet and looks down at Magnus for an answer. The therapist nods and the pair are on their way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow me on twitter @lightbroke

**Author's Note:**

> Follow me on Twitter @lightbroke


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